A. Brunneis lives in Salt Lake City. From his house he has breathtaking views of both the state capitol and the Mormon temple. But he anxiously awaits the most spectacular panorama of all--the overdue earthquake that will swallow these grand structures into the valley. He plans on exploiting the horrors of the apocalypse with a best-selling memoir, and heartily agrees with Brigham Young: "It is enough. This is the place!"

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Championing diversity has never been so entertaining. In over 600 aphorisms, essays, parables, and dialogues, such themes as God, politics, and love are explored with a view to the range of humanity's possible fates. Every negative philosophy is bled dry, every positive philosophy made negative, every relevant theology revived and twisted to bear witness. For societies sightseeing over the abyss, a tour guide is needed. This is a self-help book for the endangered species swinging on the top of the food chain. Suicide or conservation? Genes versus environment: saving one entails the abandonment of the other, and throwing yourself under a whaling boat may be the most minimal extinction event possible.