Autorentext

The School of Life is a global organisation helping people to lead more fulfilled lives. We do this via our articles, books, app, films, therapeutic services and corporate offering.

The School of Life Press brings together the thinking and ideas of the School of Life creative team under the direction of series editor, Alain de Botton. Our range of books and products explore essential topics in psychological and emotional life, including relationships, parenting, friendship, careers and fulfilment.

Klappentext

Love is a skill, not just an emotion--and in order for us to get good at it, we have to practice, as we would in any other area we want to shine in. Here is a workbook containing the very best exercises that any couple can undertake to help their relationship function optimally, exercises to foster understanding, patience, forgiveness, humor, and resilience in the face of the many hurdles that invariably arise when you try to live with someone else for the long term.

Couples are guided to have particular conversations, analyze their feelings, explain parts of themselves to one another, and undertake rituals that clear the air and help recover hope and passion. The goal is always to unblock channels of feeling and improve communication. Not least, doing exercises together is--at points--simply a lot of fun.

The notion of exercising is well understood in many areas; we should grant that it applies equally to love. No one can be intuitively good at relationships. We all need to do some homework to become the best partners and couples we can be.

Inhalt

Introduction

The Pledge

1. The Scale of the Ambition

2. The Dangerous Quest for Compatibility

3. The True Romance of Pessimism

4. Why on Earth am I With This Person?

5. What We Should Learn From One Another

6. The Secret Lives of Other Couples

7. Continuing the Conversation

8. Overcoming Our Parents

9. A Trust Checkup

10. How We See Ourselves - and How Our Partner Sees Us

11. The Little Things

12. How We Like to be Loved

13. Early Wounds

14. A New Ritual: The Morning and Evening Kiss

15. Unconscious Belittling

16. The Anxious-Avoidant Quiz

17. Projecting Emotions

18. Indirect Communication

19. A Better Kind of Evening

20. How I am Difficult to Live With

21. A Forgiveness Ritual

22. A Gratitude Ritual

23. Our Conspiracy

24. Admiration

25. The Weakness of Strength

26. Hidden Efforts

27. Undelivered Compliments

28. How to Complain

29. A Pessimistic Interlude

30. How to Argue

31. Concrete Change

32. Change is Possible

33. Be the Change You Want to See

34. Five Questions to Ask of Bad Behaviour

35. Talking About Sex

36. The Sensate Focus Method

37. Accepting the Problems

38. Less Pressure on Love

    Conclusion