Sticks and Stones

Zusatztext "A practical guide to help children be emotionally intelligent when their playmates are not." --Daniel Goleman! author of Emotional Intelligence "A wonderful! fresh new addition to the field of parent education. Creative! insightful! respectful! and practical in his approach! Scott Cooper creates colorful images that make the steps to effective communication easy to remember and follow." --Mary Sheedy Kurcinka! author of Raising Your Spirited Child "Scott Cooper gives parents ample doses of practical! easy-to-follow recipes to help children cope with relationship crises and change negative self-talk. I highly recommend his common-sense approaches to fostering a sense of well-being and strength of character." --Barbara C. Unell! author of Discipline Without Spanking or Shouting Informationen zum Autor Scott Cooper is a principal and CFO of an international planning and design firm and a member of the local school board. He has been a teacher, basketball coach, scout leader, and Boys' and Girls' club volunteer. He lives in California with his wife and three children. Klappentext Sticks and Stones helps parents teach kids how to speak up for themselves more assertively, gently, and effectively. Each chapter, based on the characteristics of a particular bird, uses a wealth of examples and imaginative exercises to give kids the confidence to speak truth to power. This unique guide, beautifully illustrated with line drawings of each bird and informed by the author's gentle humor, will help kids be effective communicators and includes easy-to-follow exercises and sample scripts. Examples include: Shut down bullies (The Way of the Blue Jay) Overcome shyness (The Way of the Black Bird) Counter peer pressure (The Way of the Hummingbird) Resolve fights (The Way of the Dove) Accept blame (The Way of the Crow) And more Leseprobe A Verbal Toolbox Within the same moment I could feel my heart sink and my anger surge. Here was my seven-year-old son, his shoulders shaking and his big, brown eyes welling with tears, and he was looking up at me for help. My easygoing, "perfect" son had just been picked on by a belligerent bully, and I wasn't going to stand for it. Somebody would have to pay. Fortunately, as I marched out the front door, I became aware of what was happening inside me and I calmed down. Actually, the belligerent bully didn't look very belligerent at all. In fact, he looked a lot like my neighbor's "perfect" son. I dealt with the situation without losing it and found out that my son hadn't been quite so perfect in this case. As it turned out, my son's feelings had spilled over and he had responded to his teasing neighbor friend with hitting and pushing -- all natural little boy reactions. But the experience made me realize that I hadn't prepared my son to deal with these kinds of situations. For that matter, I hadn't taught him how to deal with hardly any kind of difficult social situation. I began to realize in that moment that all of us carry around an internal toolbox. In that toolbox are all the tools we own for dealing with every sort of situation, confrontation, and human contact. If all I find in my toolbox when you threaten me is a hammer, I'll pound you with it. But if I also carry around lighter, more subtle tools, I'll have them available to try first. Kids need such tools, not just to deal with other kids but for the even bigger dilemma of dealing with adults -- how do you tell an unkind or unfair adult to cut it out? I decided that my son needed more than a hammer. Besides being his father, I had the background to give him something more. I had been blessed with a father who cared authentically about young people and dedicated his life to training them. As a high school agriculture teacher in the heart of the Napa Valley, he had taken many student...

Autorentext
Scott Cooper is a principal and CFO of an international planning and design firm and a member of the local school board.  He has been a teacher, basketball coach, scout leader, and Boys' and Girls' club volunteer.  He lives in California with his wife and three children.

Klappentext

Sticks and Stones helps parents teach kids how to speak up for themselves more assertively, gently, and effectively. Each chapter, based on the characteristics of a particular bird, uses a wealth of examples and imaginative exercises to give kids the confidence to speak truth to power.

This unique guide, beautifully illustrated with line drawings of each bird and informed by the author's gentle humor, will help kids be effective communicators and includes easy-to-follow exercises and sample scripts. Examples include:
Shut down bullies (The Way of the Blue Jay)
Overcome shyness (The Way of the Black Bird)
Counter peer pressure (The Way of the Hummingbird)
Resolve fights (The Way of the Dove)
Accept blame (The Way of the Crow)
And more

Leseprobe
A Verbal Toolbox

Within the same moment I could feel my heart sink and my anger surge. Here was my seven-year-old son, his shoulders shaking and his big, brown eyes welling with tears, and he was looking up at me for help. My easygoing, "perfect" son had just been picked on by a belligerent bully, and I wasn't going to stand for it. Somebody would have to pay.

Fortunately, as I marched out the front door, I became aware of what was happening inside me and I calmed down. Actually, the belligerent bully didn't look very belligerent at all. In fact, he looked a lot like my neighbor's "perfect" son. I dealt with the situation without losing it and found out that my son hadn't been quite so perfect in this case. As it turned out, my son's feelings had spilled over and he had responded to his teasing neighbor friend with hitting and pushing -- all natural little boy reactions. But the experience made me realize that I hadn't prepared my son to deal with these kinds of situations. For that matter, I hadn't taught him how to deal with hardly any kind of difficult social situation.

I began to realize in that moment that all of us carry around an internal toolbox. In that toolbox are all the tools we own for dealing with every sort of situation, confrontation, and human contact. If all I find in my toolbox when you threaten me is a hammer, I'll pound you with it. But if I also carry around lighter, more subtle tools, I'll have them available to try first. Kids need such tools, not just to deal with other kids but for the even bigger dilemma of dealing with adults -- how do you tell an unkind or unfair adult to cut it out?

I decided that my son needed more than a hammer. Besides being his father, I had the background to give him something more. I had been blessed with a father who cared authentically about young people and dedicated his life to training them. As a high school agriculture teacher in the heart of the Napa Valley, he had taken many students (less academically inclined in some cases) and helped them hone their practical skills through on-the-job projects. Some of these young men would go on to become highly regarded practitioners in the wine industry. Maybe because of my father's influence, I had spent a lot of my own adult life interested and involved in youth development efforts. Initially I had been a bilingual aide, teacher, and coach. After I obtained an MBA and entered the business world, I maintained a strong connection with youth development by coaching and participating on school and drug prevention boards. Through the years I had researched and developed a few of my own tools to help kids in the areas of self-esteem, assertiveness, and conflict resolution -- all areas that related to the tools I wanted my son to have. I had experimented in teaching these principles to teenagers and had a sense of what worked and what didn't. Additionally, the business world had increased my awareness (if not enjoyment) of real-world…