Raising Securely Attached Kids

“Eli Harwood brings infectious-fun energy, vulnerability, and fresh perspectives without shaming or blaming. Not only is --Hilary Swank, actress, storyteller, mom of twins *** Therapist and wildly popular attachment research expert Eli Harwood (a.k.a. Attachment Nerd) illuminates the science that explores our innate human need to bond with other humans, and helps us harness it as the only parenting approach proven to have a lasting impact. Her loyal following--fast approaching the millions--connects to Eli’s accessible and actionable approach that helps everyone form secure and close relationships with the children in their lives--no matter what you went through growing up. Though there have been countless studies on how attachment styles affect our romantic relationships, Hopeful and inspiring, this essential evidence-based guide shows parents, educators, and anyone with children in their lives that they are not alone in the questions and concerns they may have about raising confident, capable, and caring kids. Covering every parenting era from newborns to adults,

Autorentext

ELI HARWOOD, MA, LPC is a licensed therapist, best-selling author, and highly sought-after educator who has more than 17 years of experience helping people process relational traumas and develop secure connections with their children. She is on a mission to help make the world a better place, one relationship at a time. In addition to her clinical work, Harwood also offers online courses and in-person retreats to help individuals better understand their attachment styles and build stronger bonds. She has also served as a faculty member at The Denver Family Institute and is the author of Securely Attached. Eli has three children, one husband, two cats, and an extraordinary number of plants. Learn more about her work at AttachmentNerd.com.

Klappentext

A USA TODAY BESTSELLER | Named Forbes’ 50 Most Influential Books
Winner of the Child Psychology Award for Literary Excellence

“A comprehensive roadmap for parents who want to raise securely attached, emotionally healthy children. A parenting must-read.” —Alyssa Blask Campbell, M.Ed., author of Tiny Humans, Big Emotions

Build a lifelong foundation of connection, trust, confidence, and resilience with an evidence-based approach to secure attachment.

Raising Securely Attached Kids is a practical parenting book that translates attachment science into accessible strategies for raising emotionally healthy children. Licensed therapist and attachment expert Eli Harwood shows parents and caregivers how connection-focused parenting can strengthen relationships, encourage open communication, and help children develop empathy, confidence, resilience, and the ability to form healthy relationships.

Covering every stage from newborns through adulthood, this compassionate guide helps you:

• BREAK UNHEALTHY CYCLES: Recognize patterns from your own childhood and choose a more connected way of parenting.
• BECOME A SECURE BASE: Work through attachment wounds so you can respond with greater calm, consistency, and emotional awareness.
• CHOOSE CONNECTION OVER CONTROL: Build a secure attachment relationship while maintaining clear, healthy boundaries.
• STRENGTHEN TRUST: Use practical tools and ready-to-use scripts to navigate everyday parenting challenges.
• SUPPORT EMOTIONAL HEALTH: Help children develop confidence, empathy, resilience, and strong relationship skills.
• REPAIR AND RECONNECT: Learn why mistakes do not define your relationship—and why it is never too late to create a stronger bond.

Hopeful, relatable, and grounded in attachment research, Raising Securely Attached Kids offers guidance without shame or blame. It is an essential resource for parents, caregivers, educators, and anyone who wants to nurture confident, capable, and caring kids.

Create the secure, lasting connection your child can carry into every stage of life.

“Eli Harwood teaches the essentials of attachment, which can help parents 'show up' in ways that enable our children to become securely attached to us.” —Daniel J. Siegel, M.D., New York Times bestselling co-author of The Whole-Brain Child

“Eli Harwood brings infectious-fun energy, vulnerability, and fresh perspectives without shaming or blaming. Not only is Raising Securely Attached Kids a practical and actionable guide, it’s grounded in science and entertaining to read.” —Hilary Swank, actress, storyteller, mom of twins

Zusammenfassung
Create a secure emotional bond with your childrenfor a close, fulfilling parent-child relationship that lasts a lifetime. Therapist and wildly popular attachment research expert Eli Harwood (@attachmentnerd) illuminates attachment theory as foundational to the only parenting approach proven to have a lasting impact.

Inhalt

CONTENTS

Introduction

Chapter 1: The Most Important Lesson
Author Eli Harwood sets the stage for understanding attachment in the parenting context and the mindsets necessary for a parent to cultivate a secure relationship, and how children learn whether or not they can rely on us for connection and support.   

Chapter 2: Connection is the Most Powerful Form of Influence
This chapter explores the emotional side of parenting and the importance of those challenging moments when our kids are submerged deep into their feelings.  

Chapter 3: They Can Feel What You Don’t Heal 
This chapter focuses on the ways that our unresolved traumas from the past and our dysfunctional relationships in the present affect our children and how we can heal them in order not to pass them down to our kids.  

Chapter 4: Feelings are for Feeling
In a world full of so much misconception regarding emotional health, this chapter helps you build your child's emotional intelligence through mythbusting current mindsets about what it means to be emotionally healthy. 

Chapter 5: Structure is Nurture's Best Friend
This chapter discusses the power of playful connection and enthusiastic delight, and empowers parents to cultivate positive interactions and explores dominance vs. connection.

Chapter 6: Secure Conflict
This chapter gets into the nitty gritty of conflict with our children and the different ways it shows up in them and us and how to take a discovery mindset instead of a fear mindset with conflict.

Chapter 7: Connection as Protection
This chapter focuses on navigating outside sources of potential harm and struggle with our children. It will help parents learn how to offer protection without sliding into fear mongering or controlling responses.  

Chapter 8: The Self-Confidence Recipe
A child can only become confident in their self if they are first able to be confident in the care of others. This chapter guides parents into how to help kids feel securely adored, understood, and supported which internalizes into positive narratives about themselves.

Chapter 9: The Tricky Topics
This chapter dives into the terrain of the tricky conversations that every child needs their parents to have with them. It breaks down conversation by conversation the important things for parents to be aware of as they navigate these dialogues and how to effectively hear and be heard.  

Chapter 10: Letting Go is Staying Close
This chapter leans into the very complex and emotional process of our children building autonomy and independence. It addresses the emotional ways we come to these moments and how to offer our children the best possible launchpad to move into new stages of independence.

Appendix
Acknowledgments…