Revolting Youth

Zusatztext Praise for Youth in Revolt "The funniest book you'll read this year." Los Angeles Times "This hilariously cynical sex farce about bright teenagers combines creaky Shakespearean plot twists with real insights about growing up in the present chaos." The Oregonian Informationen zum Autor C. D. Payne is an America writer of absurdist fiction and is also the author of the novels Youth in Revolt, Civic Beauties, Cut to the Twisp, Frisco Pigeon Mambo, Young and Revolting, and Revoltingly Young , all of which he has successfully self-published. He lives in Sonoma County. Klappentext The hilarious sequel to the cult favorite Youth in Revolt! now a major motion picture starring Michael Cera and Justin Long. In the wry and subversive further journals of Nick Twisp! we reunite with America's most literate teen diarist as he accidentally ignites criminal mayhem; seeks union with his love! Sheeni Saunders; and still has to live as a girl to avoid the policean absolute must-read for all fans of the oddball humor of Youth in Revolt. Praise for Youth in Revolt "The funniest book you'll read this year." Los Angeles Times "This hilariously cynical sex farce about bright teenagers combines creaky Shakespearean plot twists with real insights about growing up in the present chaos." The Oregonian FEBRUARY SATURDAY, February 20 No, I haven't abandoned my impulse toward labored introspection. I've simply been too busy coping with the distractions of sudden wealth to write in my journal. It's fortunate for New England asceticism that Henry Thoreau didn't win big in the stock market while camping out at Walden Pond. Like me, Hank would probably be making countless expeditions with his future Trophy Wife (Sheeni Saunders) to the big city (Santa Rosa, California) in search of luxurious household furnishings for his rented bachelor digs. Carlotta Ulansky (my 14-year-old feminine alter ego) is inclined toward the comfortably overstuffed, but Sheeni insists on the rigorously tasteful. She has replaced Granny DeFalco's spine-crunching old couch with a sinuous sofa of hand-woven wool (color: eviscerated celadon) fashioned by brooding, socially conscious Finns. Upon this taut perch this afternoon we successfully performed our 31st act of sexual union. Now a casually tossed mauve linen pillow conceals a small, telltale moist spot. For the sake of statistical texture in my future autobiographytentatively titled Nick Dillinger UnmaskedI've decided to keep a running total of my sexual experiences (excepting only solo acts, already too numerous to count). This should prove invaluableto future sociologists studying the amorous habits of oversexed, alcoholic fiction writers. Perhaps I'll keep track of my beverage consumption as well, though I fear the inexorable binges of middle age may muddle the count. So far at any rate my lifetime cocktailtotal is up to four. Back to sex. I've found that one of the nicest aspects of sexual intercourse is that delicious moment when one is maneuvering one's clammy nakedness atop one's submissive loveheart fluttering, senses tingling, be-condomed T.E. (Thunderous Erection) honing in on its target like a laser-guided smart bomb. I asked Sheeni if girls enjoyed that moment of exquisite anticipation as well. "I hardly think so, Nickie," she replied. "We're usually paralyzed with fear that the dolt is going to stuff it up our bladder or something." All in all I'm glad I was born a male, even if lately I do spend a good part of my time dressed as an elderly Italian widow. Yes, homely Carlotta continues her role as a one-girl fashion harbinger of the long-delayed "Mussolini Revival." Ten minutes later. My journalistic ruminations were interrupted by the sounds of ear-piercing howling. Carlotta rose from her lac...

Praise for Youth in Revolt

"The funniest book you'll read this year." —*Los Angeles Times

"This hilariously cynical sex farce about bright teenagers combines creaky Shakespearean plot twists with real insights about growing up in the present chaos." —*The Oregonian

Autorentext

C. D. Payne is an America writer of absurdist fiction and is also the author of the novels Youth in Revolt, Civic Beauties, Cut to the Twisp, Frisco Pigeon Mambo, Young and Revolting, and Revoltingly Young, all of which he has successfully self-published. He lives in Sonoma County.

Klappentext

The hilarious sequel to the cult favorite Youth in Revolt, now a major motion picture starring Michael Cera and Justin Long.

In the wry and subversive further journals of Nick Twisp, we reunite with America's most literate teen diarist as he accidentally ignites criminal mayhem; seeks union with his love, Sheeni Saunders; and still has to live as a girl to avoid the police—an absolute must-read for all fans of the oddball humor of Youth in Revolt.

Praise for Youth in Revolt

"The funniest book you'll read this year." —Los Angeles Times

"This hilariously cynical sex farce about bright teenagers combines creaky Shakespearean plot twists with real insights about growing up in the present chaos." —The Oregonian

Leseprobe
FEBRUARY 
SATURDAY, February 20 — No, I haven't abandoned my impulse toward labored introspection. I've simply been too busy coping with the distractions of sudden wealth to write in my journal. It's fortunate for New England asceticism that Henry Thoreau didn't win big in the stock market while camping out at Walden Pond.  

Like me, Hank would probably be making countless expeditions with his future Trophy Wife (Sheeni Saunders) to the big city (Santa Rosa, California) in search of luxurious household furnishings for his rented bachelor digs. Carlotta Ulansky (my 14-year-old feminine alter ego) is inclined toward the comfortably overstuffed, but Sheeni insists on the rigorously tasteful. She has replaced Granny DeFalco's spine-crunching old couch with a sinuous sofa of hand-woven wool (color: eviscerated celadon) fashioned by brooding, socially conscious Finns. Upon this taut perch this afternoon we successfully performed our 31st act of sexual union. Now a casually tossed mauve linen pillow conceals a small, telltale moist spot.  

For the sake of statistical texture in my future autobiography—tentatively titled Nick Dillinger Unmasked—I've decided to keep a running total of my sexual experiences (excepting only solo acts, already too numerous to count). This should prove invaluableto future sociologists studying the amorous habits of oversexed, alcoholic fiction writers. Perhaps I'll keep track of my beverage consumption as well, though I fear the inexorable binges of middle age may muddle the count. So far at any rate my lifetime cocktailtotal is up to four.  

Back to sex. I've found that one of the nicest aspects of sexual intercourse is that delicious moment when one is maneuvering one's clammy nakedness atop one's submissive love—heart fluttering, senses tingling, be-condomed T.E. (Thunderous Erection) honing in on its target like a laser-guided smart bomb. I asked Sheeni if girls enjoyed that moment of exquisite anticipation as well.  

"I hardly think so, Nickie," she replied. "We're usually paralyzed with fear that the dolt is going to stuff it up our bladder or something."  

All in all I'm glad I was born a male, even if lately I do spend a good part of my time dressed as an elderly Italian widow. Yes, homely Carlotta continues her role as a one-girl fashion harbinger of the long-delayed "Mussolini Revival."  

Ten minutes later. My journalistic ruminations were interrupted by the sounds of ear-piercing howling. Carlotta rose from her lacquered teak computer desk and strolled into the living room where her obese maid, Mrs. Flora Ferguson (nee Crampton), was beating Sheeni's ugly black dog Albert with the New York Review of Books.   "What's the …