Running on Empty

Autorentext

Jonice Webb has a PhD in clinical psychology, and has been licensed to practice since 1991. She has a strong background in research, psychological testing and psychotherapy.  Webb has been the Director of three large outpatient clinics over the course of her career. She currently has a private psychotherapy practice in Lexington, MA, where she specializes in the treatment of couples and adolescents. Webb currently resides in the Boston area with her husband and two children.

Klappentext

A large segment of the population struggles with feelings of being detached from themselves and their loved ones. They feel flawed, and blame themselves. Running on Empty will help them realize that they're suffering not because of something that happened to them in childhood, but because of something that didn't happen. It's the white space in their family picture, the background rather than the foreground. This will be the first self-help book to bring this invisible force to light, educate people about it, and teach them how to overcome it.

Zusammenfassung
Running on Empty is the first self-help book about Emotional Neglect: an invisible force from your childhood which you can't see, but may be affecting you profoundly to this day. It is about what didn't happen in your childhood, what wasn't said, and what cannot be remembered.

Do you sometimes feel as if you're just going through the motions in life? Are you good at looking and acting as if you're fine, but secretly feel lonely and disconnected? Perhaps you have a fine life and are good at your work, but somehow it's just not enough to make you happy.

If so, you are not alone. The world is full of people who have an innate sense that something is wrong with them. Who feel they live on the outside looking in, but have no explanation for their feeling and no way to put it into words. Who blame themselves for not being happier.

If you are one of these people, you may fear that you are not connected enough to your spouse, or that you don't feel pleasure or love as profoundly as others do. Perhaps when you do experience strong emotions, you have difficulty understanding or tolerating them. You may drink too much, or eat too much, or risk too much, in an attempt to feel something good.

In over twenty years of practicing psychology, many people have arrived in Jonice Webb's office, driven by the threat of divorce or the onset of depression, or by loneliness, and said, ""Something is missing in me.""

Running on Empty will give you clear strategies for how to heal, and offers a special chapter for mental health professionals. In the world of human suffering, this book is an Emotional Smart Bomb meant to eradicate the effects of an invisible enemy.

Inhalt
Preface
Acknowledgements
Introduction
Emotional Neglect Questionnaire

Part I: Running on Empty
Chapter 1: Why Wasn’t the Tank Filled?
The Ordinary Healthy Parent in Action
Chapter 2: Twelve Ways to End Up Empty
Type 1: The Narcissistic Parent
Type 2: The Authoritarian Parent
Type 3: The Permissive Parent
Type 4: The Bereaved Parent: Divorced or Widowed
Type 5: The Addicted Parent
Type 6: The Depressed Parent
Type 7: The Workaholic Parent
Type 8: The Parent with a Special Needs Family Member
Type 9: The Achievement/Perfection Focused Parent
Type 10:The Sociopathic Parent
Type 11:Child as Parent
Type 12:The Well-Meaning-but-Neglected-Themselves Parent

Part II: Out of Fuel
Chapter 3: The Neglected Child, All Grown Up

1. Feelings of Emptiness
2. Counter-Dependence
3. Unrealistic Self-Appraisal
4. No Compassion for Self, Plenty for Others
5. Guilt and Shame: What is Wrong With Me?
6. Self-Directed Anger, Self-Blame
7. The Fatal Flaw (If People Really Know Me They Won’t Like Me)
8. Difficulty Nurturing Self and Others
9. Poor Self-Discipline
10. Alexithymia
    Chapter 4: Cognitive Secrets: The Special Problem of Suicidal Feelings

Part III: Filling the Tank
Chapter 5: How Change Happens
Factors That Get in the Way of Successful Change
Chapter 6: Why Feelings Matter and What to Do with Them

1. Understanding the Purpose and Value of Your Emotions
2. Identifying and Naming Your Feelings
3. Learning to Self-Monitor Your Feelings
4. Accepting and Trusting Your Own Feelings
5. Learning to Express Your Feelings Effectively
6. Recognizing, Understanding and Valuing Emotions in Relationships
   Chapter 7: Self-Care
   Self-Care Part 1. Learning to Nurture Yourself
   Self-Care Part 2. Improving Self-Discipline
   Self-Care Part 3. Self-Soothing
   Self-Care Part 4. Having Compassion for Yourself
   Chapter 8: Ending the Cycle: Giving Your Child What You Never Got
7. Your Parental Guilt
8. The Changes You Have Made So Far
9. Identify Your Own Specific Parenting Challenges
   Chapter 9: For the Therapist
   Research
   Identification of Emotional Neglect
   Treatment
   Summary for the Therapist
   Conclusion

Resources for Recovery

References